“Dad’s got a serious face on,” Jack muttered, and both boys dropped their phones. My husband Gary’s brother, Richard, had been charged with murdering his wife Rachel. And now, Gary was telling our two boys, Jack and Liam, the news none of us wanted to hear: the family holiday to Florida was off. “No way,” Liam said, his voice flat.
“We’re not going? ” Jack demanded. “It’s because of this police investigation, mate,” Gary said. “Yeah, but what’s that got to do with our family holiday?
” Jack asked. “It’s not for discussion,” Gary said firmly. But the damage was done. They couldn’t go to sunny Orlando because their dad’s cousin was in prison, accused of killing his wife.
I knew what this was really about. “Is this got to do with him? ” I challenged Gary. “Don’t do that,” he warned.
“Gary’s been a great dad to you. He’s just got caught up in someone else’s problems. ”
Our family was collateral damage. No matter what happened with Richard’s case, we were all suffering for it.
Meanwhile, Gary’s own guilt was eating him alive. He and Richard had been like brothers once, but they’d grown apart over the years. Now Gary was blaming himself. “I was the one that made him go home that night,” he confided to me.
The night Richard stayed at our place instead of going back to Rachel. The night that ended in her death. “Now Lucy’s with strangers and Rich is in a prison cell. And Rachel’s in a morgue.
And I’ve got blood on my hands. ”
I tried to reassure him. He wasn’t a mind reader. He couldn’t have known what Richard would do.
But nothing I said could lift the weight he’d placed on his own shoulders. Everyone in the pub had an opinion. Tim’s cousin’s a bit too pleased with himself, Steve said. Domestic violence runs in the Metcalfe genes, Tracy Barlow announced.
The gossip was relentless. The moment I walked into the Rovers, I heard people speculating about whether Richard was guilty or innocent. Being related to a murder suspect made us pariahs. But Sarah had her own problems.
A police officer named Kit Green had confessed he was still in love with me. An ex-fling from my past. He’d been hurt, and I knew that complicated feelings could make people do stupid things. But with the family fallout and Richard’s trial hanging over us, I didn’t have the energy to deal with his barely-hidden affection either.
Kate, another officer, had phoned me. She was angry because my evidence had helped the case against her beloved Richard. But I didn’t care about her anger. I was just trying to protect my family from the fallout, even if it meant making enemies.
Liam’s A-level results were due. Jack was furious. The boys were being punished for Richard’s choices. I promised myself I wouldn’t let this tear us apart.
But no matter how many times I said, “This won’t break us,” the pressure kept building. The real crisis wasn’t just the opinion of the town. It was the secret Gary couldn’t stop carrying. He believed he was responsible.
He had pushed Richard to go home to his wife on the night she died. He had listened to Richard’s fears about Rachel’s temper, watched him sleep on the sofa to avoid her, and still he had insisted that the marriage was worth saving. Now Richard claimed he acted in self-defense. His daughter Lucy was in emergency foster care.
And my husband was drowning in remorse. One evening, while the boys were complaining about the canceled holiday, Gary tried to make light of things. “Can’t a chap have a resting happy face? ” he joked.
But he couldn’t hide the cracks. “You’re all collateral damage,” I said to Beth, our other family member. “Liam and Jack. Harry and Bethany.
Me. Everyone is suffering because of this mess. ”
We couldn’t go back and change what had happened. Richard had made his choices, the evidence was stacking against him, and Gary was trapped in the middle, watching his own family fall apart because of a cousin he once trusted.
As more messages came in and more evidence piled up, the reality of the situation hit us all. The trial would stretch on, the verdict uncertain, and the damage to our family irreversible. Gary stood by me, but I could see he was carrying the weight of what had happened to Richard and Rachel—and to Lucy, an innocent child now alone in the world because of a marriage gone fatally wrong.
I just hoped we could survive what was still to come.
