Rosie O’Donnell is making headlines once again, this time for a heartfelt yet complicated gesture aimed at honoring her nonbinary child’s pronouns. The 64-year-old comedian recently revealed a new tattoo on her left wrist that reads “they,” a tribute to her 13-year-old child, Clay, who came out as nonbinary in 2024. However, during her conversation on Amy Poehler’s “Good Hang” podcast, O’Donnell found herself slipping up by repeatedly referring to Clay as “she.”
In an emotional discussion, O’Donnell admitted that adapting to Clay’s preferred pronouns has been challenging. “It’s very hard, honey. And [gender-neutral pronouns] really matters to them, and I know it matters to them,” she shared, acknowledging her struggle to remember the correct terms.
Clay, formerly known as Dakota, even created a cue card with “they” written on it, which they would hold up whenever O’Donnell accidentally used the wrong pronoun.
O’Donnell, who has been living in Ireland since the political turmoil following the 2024 election, took the cue card to a tattoo artist to immortalize Clay’s preferred pronouns in their handwriting. She hoped this gesture would deeply resonate with her child. However, her expectations were dashed when Clay reportedly didn’t seem to care much about the tattoo at all.
“I thought she’d be very touched … she could not care less,” O’Donnell recounted, humorously catching herself once again misusing the pronoun.
The comedian, who famously came out as gay in 2002, has previously discussed the enlightening conversations she’s had with Clay about gender identity. In a 2024 interview, she recalled a moment when Clay explained the distinction between 𝒔𝒆𝒙 and gender: “Mommy [genitalia] is their 𝒔𝒆𝒙. That’s binary.
I’m talking about their gender, and gender is infinite.”
As O’Donnell navigates this learning curve, her experiences raise important questions about understanding and respecting nonbinary identities. How can we all better support those around us in their journeys of self-discovery?
